What a Mess!

I was getting ready to write a blog post on finding your character's voice and I happened to notice a post that I forgot to publish. Oops. Anyway, I thought it might be interesting to read if you find yourself unorganized in the middle of writer's block.

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I have a private Google website I use for all my novel planning.  R.J. and I also have one for Bloodleggers.  In the past, these websites have been more than helpful in recording ideas, tracking characters, plotting, outlining, etc.  Well, I stopped maintaining them far too long ago, and what an outdated mess they've become!  Thanks to The Artist's Way tough, I've been in cleaning mode for a couple of weeks now. 

I've been working my way very slowly through the sections, taking the time to read each chapter twice and complete all the exercises, so at times I find my progress is a little ahead of where I'm reading in the book.  Like when I read this after hitting my office like a Ms. Clean tornado a couple Wednesdays ago.

One of the clearest signals that something healthy is afoot is the impulse to weed out, sort through, and discard old clothes, papers, and belongings...  By tossing out the old and unworkable, we make way for the new and suitable...  When the search-and-discard impulse seizes you, two cross currents are at work:  the old you is leaving and grieving, while the new you celebrates and grows strong.

So this is where I am at the moment, working through my writer's funk.  Only now the cleaning has moved to the computer.  One thing that came out of cleaning up the office was a pile of hand written story ideas and edits I need to incorporate into the novels.  Looking at the pile, it occurred to me I may have brought on some of the writers block by being so unorganized and scattered.  Time to clean it all up and get on with the writing.

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You'll be happy to know I officially exited the clean up mode a couple weeks ago. The office is immaculate and the website back in use, including a nearly complete outline for book 3 of The Courier.

No More Social Networking...For Now

I've finally given in to a series of synchronistic events that have tirelessly directed me to lay off the social networking for awhile.  Until 2011 to be exact.  I'm the one that threw that date out and so far I haven't gotten any flack back from The Universe about it. 

Yeah, I know, I keep going back and forth about networking and blogging, and you're probably not taking me seriously.  I expect that response.  Like a lot of writers, I've unfortunately felt that I have to keep my face out there if I want to successfully market The Courier when it's finally published.  That's where the vacillating comes into play.  NO MORE!

Bottom line, social networking expends writing time, and I'm beginning to resent the process.  Another good reason to lay off it for awhile.  So as I make the announcements on the social networking sites I frequent, I'm feeling a sense of relief that I can concentrate only on writing for the next three months.  

I still plan to check in here periodically about my progress with Bloodleggers and The Courier series.  I've been checking in regularly over on The Courier's website too.

Oh, and I enjoy writing about my adventures in clearing writer's block using The Artist's Way.  I've also added another book, Writing Down the Bones: Freeing the Writer Within by Natalie Goldberg.  Harley King suggested this book in my Morning Pages post a month ago.  Requested it from the library right away, but it's a popular book so I had to wait until Sunday to get my turn reading it.  I've been devouring it and will definitely get my own copy soon. 

Are You Listening to His Messages?

Yesterday I began reading week 2 of The Artist's Way.  It's all about recovering a sense of identity.

"This week addresses self-definition as a major component of creative recovery.  You may find yourself drawing new boundaries and staking out new territories as your personal needs, desires, and interests announce themselves..."

I got to a section on crazymakers that I found as entertaining this time through as the last time I read it some ten years ago. 

"...those personalities that create storm centers.  They are often charismatic, frequently charming, highly inventive, and powerfully persuasive.  And for the creative person in their vicinity, they are enormously destructive.  You know the type:  charismatic but out of control, long on problems and short on solutions."

Rather than quote more of the book, I found this fun blog post, Five Traits of a Narcissist or 'Crazymaker' you must drop by and read.

I've tried to steer clear of these types of people, but I've sure put up with my fair share, some way longer than I should have.  Lately though, I've cut them out of my life as soon as I've figured them out.  It almost became a necessity after I started dealing with some health issues, thank you God, that are almost gone.  So I figured I wouldn't have much to work on in the crazymaker arena. 

LOL!!  I ran into one the very next morning.  A few doors down from our home.  Now ROFLOL!!

It was almost like God sent her to me to say, "Hey!  Wendy!  I guided you back to The Artist's Way for a reason.  Now go back and read that section again." 

I don't really feel it's necessary to go into the details of the crazymaker encounter because the message was sent and received.  Am now headed back to read that section again.

Morning Pages

The first thing you've gotta get used to doing while following The Artist's Way are the morning pages.  Every morning the program requires that you write three pages of the first things that comes to mind.  I'm three days in and wondering why I stopped the brain dump journaling so many years ago. 

I used to do my morning pages on the bus ride into Downtown Denver every workday morning and with coffee on the weekends.  I think I still have the notebooks around the house somewhere.  I remember working for Qwest (U.S. West at the time) as a project manager back then.  It was the most stressful and irritating job I've ever had.  In hindsight, doing the morning pages probably saved my sanity.

Anyways, after dumping just 9 pages, I can feel the clutter in my brain chipping away, WHOORAY!  Funny thing is though, I don't remember what I wrote.  You're not supposed to go back and read over it.  So I have to ask myself, how insignificant is the stuff I let clutter up my brain?

Okay, I'm Blocked...Now What?

If you read Tuesday's post, I complained that another year has passed and I'm not happy with my publishing progress, like I complain most years around my birthday.  By the way, it was an amazing birthday.  Thanks you so much to everyone who sent me happy birthday wishes.  You're all wonderful!!  Anyways, it turned out to be the best birthday gift I could have given myself, being critical that is.  It finally got me to admit that I'm going through the dreaded "writer's block," which I prefer to call "the funk."

Hey, we all go through it at least once in our careers, right?  For me this is trip number two through the thick gunky dark bottleneck of writer's block.  I didn't recognize it at first because I've still been writing, which is why I feel this is more of a funk than a block.  It's the low number of new words and frustration with editing that were the first clues I ignored.  The second clue is the pages of The Courier that are sitting in the word processor, ready for release on Twitter and the website, but I just can't bring myself to copy and paste it in.  Third clue, doing lots of research for Bloodleggers and avoiding connecting with my main character, Miss Regina Todd. Oh, yeah, and there's the whole wanting to quit thing I've written about in the Bloodleggers and The Courier blogs.

So what now? I asked myself before I rolled out of bed yesterday.

First thing I did was pull one of my favorite books off the shelf that I keep handy for such emergencies.  It hasn't seriously come off the shelf for ten plus years though. The Artist's Way got me through a pretty "funky" rough spot back then.  All it took was a quick read through the introduction and I realized that I have more than writer's block.  This is also a spiritual disconnect.  This quote alone in the margin of the book spoke to me and confirmed it.

"I myself do nothing.  The Holy Spirit accomplishes all through me."

--William Blake

I don't want to go into too many details on the spiritual disconnect today, but after reading the introduction to The Artist's Way, I needed some spiritual guidance.  So I went searching for the nearest spiritual book I could find, which around here could be connected to about any religion.  Beside me was Jefferson's Bible and The Koran and neither were quite appropriate for what I was seeking out.   So I walked into the living room and found a quick read, The Essence of Happiness, A Guidebook for Living by His Holiness the Dalai Lama and Howard C. Cutler, M.D.  This is a tiny little book my sister gave me years ago.  It sits on an end table in our living room between a statue of Jesus and The Buddha.  I try to read this book whenever I feel my life path is being distracted by anger or other negative emotions.  I read it, and to make a long story even longer, I found this passage inspiring.

On a personal level, being open and sharing things can be very useful.  Because of this nature I can make friends more easily, and it's not just a matter of knowing people and having a superficial exchange but of really sharing my deepest problems and suffering.  And it's the same thing when I hear good news, I immediately share it with others.  So, I feel a sense of intimacy and connections with my friends.

So I've decided to share my journey in the midst of my "funk" here in my blog.  Mostly it'll be connected with 12 weeks of following The Artist's Way, which is also, as the title states, "a spiritual path to higher creativity."  I'll be sharing lots of the negative, lots of the positive, and lots of spiritual talk that will be connected to about every religion and philosophy on Earth, past and present.  It all depends on where The Universe and God decide take me. 

I don't want to make this just about me though.  If any other writers out there are experiencing what I am, and you want to pick up a copy of The Artist's Way and join me, let me know.  I'd love to include links to your blog or make my blog available to you if you need a place to vent.

And so the journey begins...